Yesterday, Minnesota Twins pitcher Ervin Santana was suspended 80 games for testing positive for a performance enhancing drug called stanozolol. Santana gave the typical response, saying "I am frustrated that I can't pinpoint how the substance in question entered my body. I would never knowingly take anything illegal to enhance my performance."
It's crazy how so many Major League Baseball players can never seem to figure out how substances enter their bodies. I just don't get it.
How long before we catch this super-villain who's going around and ruining guys' lives by "roofying" them with steroids? The FBI must be hot on his trail by now...
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