Why do MLB players keep getting 'roofied' with steroids?

Yesterday, Minnesota Twins pitcher Ervin Santana was suspended 80 games for testing positive for a performance enhancing drug called stanozolol.  Santana gave the typical response, saying "I am frustrated that I can't pinpoint how the substance in question entered my body. I would never knowingly take anything illegal to enhance my performance."

It's crazy how so many Major League Baseball players can never seem to figure out how substances enter their bodies.  I just don't get it.

How long before we catch this super-villain who's going around and ruining guys' lives by "roofying" them with steroids?  The FBI must be hot on his trail by now...

Follow @LucidSportsFan

What's the point of the "Wild Card" in the NHL?

The top 3 teams from each of the 4 divisions
aren't listed here.

I noticed this for the first time a few weeks ago.  The NHL has "Wild Card" playoff teams, and it's pretty weird.

The league no longer takes the top eight teams overall in a conference.  It now goes with the top three from each division, then the next best two.  So if by some chance six of the eight best teams in a conference are all in the same division, tough luck, one of them isn't getting in.  It's strange and confusing, and my guess is a huge number of hockey fans aren't even aware of it.

The other night a couple guys came into my bar talking about how excited they were for the Bruins recent hot streak.  I asked them what they thought of this playoff format (hoping for an explanation of why it came to be), and they looked at me like I had three heads.

I did a little research online just now to try to figure out what the point is, but nothing jumped out at me.  My guess is it's somehow supposed to build division rivalries, but I don't see it.  The one thing I did learn, though, is that this system was in place last year too.  Oops.  I'm definitely not a hockey guy.

It also really bugs me how one conference has two more teams than the other, that's totally unfair.  And if you have insight as to why this "Wild Card" thing makes sense, please enlighten me.

Follow @LucidSportsFan

Please do not bring your 'selfie stick' to the ballgame

I'd heard rumors about these things, but this is the first time I've seen actual documented evidence of their existence.

Let me be the first to say, they need to be one of the things the TD Garden (and all arenas, ballparks and stadiums) does a security check for on the way into the building.  I realize they shrink down and fit inside a purse, so obviously they'll be difficult to spot.  But I don't care, they have to be stopped.  Even if somebody has to invent some kind of special "selfie stick" detector, we can't have these things infiltrating sporting events.  We just can't.

selfie stick struggle is real... pic.twitter.com/bbwhr1gIyW
— Adam Himmelsbach (@AdamHimmelsbach) April 2, 2015

He's got to be the worst "fan" at last night's game, right?

Fundamentally, I just don't get it.  There are literally 17,565 people nearby you could ask to take your picture, what do you need the effing stick for?


Follow @LucidSportsFan

Initial thoughts on ESPN's new website

Whenever stuff changes, people always complain.  That's just the way it is.  For that reason I'm going to try not to be the grumpy old man who can't handle something new and unfamiliar--I'll give myself some time to adjust to the new ESPN.com before I rush to any snap judgments.

However, there is one thing I feel confident in saying is definitely worse: It takes up too much space.  Below is a full screenshot of how the NBA standings from the site appear on my computer:

I couldn't even get the entire Eastern Conference to fit on the screen at once.  That's not good.

The internet is all about speed and quick access to information.  The faster I can view something, the better it is.  It's a pretty simple concept, and the same reason why I detest slideshow articles (I apologize, but Bleacher Report prefers them).

Follow @LucidSportsFan

Better Celtics highlight: Marcus Smart's block or Gerald Wallace's alley-oop?

Both of the following came during the Celtics' win in Charlotte last night.

Smart:



Wallace:



I'm in favor of Wallace, because Smart just turned 21 and Wallace is 167.  The fact that he called for the pass up high from Avery Bradley makes it all the more impressive.  You can read more about Wallace's "vintage" jam on CelticsLife.

And make sure to check out my Hoops Habit article on the ridiculous year the Clippers' DeAndre Jordan is having.  He's about to post the second-greatest field goal percentage season ever (71.1% at the moment), while simultaneously having the second-worst free-throw percentage season of all time (37.7%).

Quick/easy trivia, who is the guy who holds the record for both (click the link above for the answer)?

Follow @LucidSportsFan

Awesome Old Song of the Week: "Kiss the Rain" by Billie Myers

Kiss the Rain was released in September of 1997.  It reached No. 15 on the Billboard pop charts the following year, and was the only big hit for British singer Billie Myers.

The song's fame may have peaked in October of 1998, when it appeared in the second episode of the second season of Dawson's Creek:





Follow @LucidSportsFan

Recycle Sunday No. 14: Highlights from last summer

It looks like we'll never know what was really wrong with Serena Williams at Wimbledon that day...

ESPN made absurd/impossible statistical comparisons with how World Cup soccer relates to other sports.

My expectations for Sharknado 2, which lived up to the hype.

The NFL has the longest preseason of any major sport. How dumb is that?

On a Friday night in August, the best sporting event going was a 15-year-old kid's tennis match.

The existence of playoffs in minor league baseball is stupid.  Here's why.

Orioles honor Derek Jeter's 'last day game in Baltimore on a Friday' (OK, not really, but...).  Also now that he's retired, can you guess which Yankee has the most World Series rings?

Brilliant idea for fantasy football: A "bench alternate" you can sub in after the fact.

I love this restaurant's "we don't care about your food allergies" sign; Carrie Bradshaw take note.

The A's were the best team in baseball last year, until they traded away their No. 3 hitter.  I thought it was a very bad idea.  They suffered an epic collapse immediately afterwards.

After getting crushed 41-14 in Kansas City, people were freaking out about the 2-2 Patriots.  I wrote a blog called Postponing the Premature Patriots Panic.  The week after that I wrote another called The dropped interception that saved Tom Brady's career and extended the Patriots dynasty.


Previous "Recycle Sunday" posts


Follow @LucidSportsFan